Rubbishy Cookery

  This is a very old recipe from my childhood and not an original but I am assuming that it is now an open access, free of copyright recipe, so this is like singing an old traditional folk song without permission. It is also a very lowbrow cake that literally everyone loves and if you make it for any occasion you’ll be lauded and celebrated. It’s not a classy pineapple upside down cake, which someone will surely comment on. But I made this cake for a dinner gathering last night where the main dish was fresh Atlantic lobster, and the guests had very sophisticated, urban palates, and this cake was the hit of the night. So here we go! Ingredients: It doesn’t get simpler than that, does it? Except it does if you use a store bought white cake or sponge cake instead of making the cake in a box as I did. The other ingredients are non negotiable. Directions: First, the morning of your cake, start draining the crushed canned pineapple in the fridge: You’re going to get some nice free pineap...

  I know tapioca pudding is not my original recipe, nor is it a fan favourite, nor do most people even like it. But on an impromptu trip to the grocery store today, with the thought that maybe, just maybe, I would find something special that was not on the grocery list, I happily found a box of classic tapioca pudding: I was doubly excited to see that a childhood favourite dessert now comes with microwave directions that fit in perfectly with my rubbishy cookery philosophy! So today’s blog entry isn’t an original recipe, but rather an experimental walk through of the microwave version of the recipe on the box, made EXACTLY AS DIRECTED!  Ingredients: Directions: Let’s follow the directions EXACTLY as written on the box to ensure a happy ending (not that kind of happy ending, get your head out of the gutter!). Start by lightly beating one egg in our microwaveable dish: Add the sugar, tapioca, and milk in EXACTLY the proportions instructed on the box and stir: Then we’ll pop it i...

It’s fall! It’s apple season! Finally! This is a basic apple crisp/crumble recipe that apparently was also once referred to as Apple Betty, which doesn’t sound quite right in 2024. I originally found it here: Which was found in this vintage 1980s cookbook that came for free with the very first microwave oven my parents ever owned: That was back in the early days of microwave ovens, when they were promoted as a conventional oven replacement, and this book has recipes for full course microwave cooking, including « roast » chicken.  If you are interested , here is the original microwave version recipe for today’s dish, with my mother’s annotations and approval (hence the check mark): I don’t think I’m breaking any copyright laws printing this recipe, but just in case, please don’t tell Quasar. Or Betty. Anyway, we’re going to go off script, as usual. Ingredients: Directions: We’re going to have to peel some apples. Do you have an apple peeler? This handy device is a zillion years old,...